Originally written September 2006:

My daughter will turn 16 this year. Sweet sixteen. It’s an appropriate title. She’s been a beautiful, kind, and sweet girl all of her life.

Plus, she’s smart, too. Very smart. Smart enough to give a wonderful lesson to her dad. Smart enough to give a lesson without even trying. Perhaps she wasn’t trying to teach me anything, but she did.

She reminded me of a lesson in faith. Not religious faith but pure, action-do-it-as-you-are-led faith. It’s a lesson I’d shared with her about 4 years ago.

Four years ago I left a successful restaurant, lounge, & Oregon lottery business I owned because I felt like I’d rather earn a living helping people, instead of exploiting their weaknesses. I sold my successful business and moved into the alternative healing, teaching, and behavior change therapy practice.

My daughter had grown up as a restaurateur’s child and understood the restaurant business as good as any 11 year old and better than most adults. I explained my shift in consciousness as the primary reason for leaving the restaurant business. I explained my actions by my faith in doing what I was “supposed to be doing”.

Recently, as I considered my dwindling checking account balance in my new practice, the balance wasn’t what I “thought” it should be. My funds were low. My faith was low.

And as a result I’d considered resuming a job as part-time bartender.

After the years I’d worked in the food and beverage industry as owner/operator, chief cook bottle-washer, and bartender I knew bar money is certain and steady.

But for some reason I couldn’t get any restaurants interested in hiring me. My interview processes went OK, but I couldn’t get a callback.

As we were having our weekend one-on-one meal date my daughter casually asked “Dad, did you get that job?” I was surprised. I didn’t even know she was paying attention to my job stuff.

“Nope” I replied “They didn’t call me back”.

“Well”, she said “You might have made some money, but you’d probably not been happy doing the bartender thing”

“What?” I queried.

“Yeah, remember why you stopped doing it before?” she asked.

Then it hit me. She was calling me on my faith. Better to make money by helping people than exploiting their weakness. Wow….

All I could say was “Yep, you’re right”. The daughter teaches the daddy. Again.

And while I’m sure I am a better dad to her than my dad was to me, I often wonder if I am as good a father as I can be. Am I ‘present’ enough? Am I ‘real’ enough?

Am I living and teaching the life lessons that matter?

I believe the measure of a good training is by the amount of questions one raises, not by the questions one answers. With this measure, my daughter is a wonderful teacher! She sure helps me ask some much needed questions at a time like this.

Of course, your mileage may vary.

Dr Jay